As a business owner, wife, and mother I am always trying to juggle and balance my priorities. My family is and will always be my heart, my driving force and the reason behind all that I do. That is why it was vital that I hired more employees to handle the growth in my business. It is always a challenge with me being so hands on and passionate about everything. I know that going on four hours of sleep each night is catching up to me. I am going through such a huge trial right now that is so deeply personal that I cannot and will not share outside my family. Through the many daily tears... I just KEEP GOING. I look for the good even though the storm of the magnitude of a tsunami knocks me down... setbacks... What can I say other than that I feel heartbroken and each day right now is FOCUSED on my family and not letting my heartbreak change me as a person. I have to keep going and as Dr Phil said, "Look where you're going, NOT where you've been." What I ultimately want is a a life surrounded by my family, true friends and doing what I love MOST. I just am so super sad that in KEEPING GOING I have to FACE some tough issues alone. My husband is beyond worried, sad and just feels helpless. So I go on... I go on... just being grateful that no matter what I have the HOPE and FAITH that I will have Ty back healthy again and I won't be alone as I face this journey.
I have learned that LIFE can change in moment. A new normal can and does happen. I never in a million years thought my husband would be homebound, in bed almost all day, getting transfusions twice a day and dealing with not only cancer but a severe reaction to the drugs they gave him to save him life. Right now, we are dealing with the fact that the anti rejection drugs are not working. I haven't wanted to post this but RIGHT now... he is BATTLING like nothing else. He can only keep his spirits high and keep doing whatever the specialists recommend. He is so prone to an infection that he is literally 1,000% away from all people other then me and the boys. No one else is even coming into our house. My friend came to visit me and she stayed with my children. We can't take any risks. Through it all Tyler has NEVER once complained to me.
Ty is my cheerleader and only praises me and thanks me daily for working so hard to provide for our family, run our errands, do all the grocery shopping, etc. and remember to "endure it well."
The song is Telling the WORLD...
about the LOVE that I live for and the one who deserves it,
it is because of you TYLER that I get going... EVERY part of my heart... I love you best friend!!!!!!
He's the ONE... He's the ONE... because of Tyler I keep going with faith, love and gratitude for my husband and family.
*so did not expect to post any of this today. Just followed my heart and let the words flow.