My husband showed his love to us by always serving and doing things for us. For years, I never put gasoline in my car. I later realized that all husbands didn't do this for their wife. Over the years, I knew this was his "love language." It was huge and he just loved to do things for me and kids. When he got sick, it was so hard for him. I told him one day that I truly believe that when people are sick and they need help, it is a way for others to serve and do what Christ would want and would do himself for us. I believe God works through other people. I am feeling this very profoundly now.
I am so thankful I took this photo in the hospital. This is my brave
husband being a WARRIOR. He was having one of his stem cell transplant here. I took this photo silently on my cell phone (remember he hated photos taken). He did not want to remember this time. I knew that I needed to remember this time. I knew that this was part of our journey. I could not have been prouder or more in love with him. He struggled at times with losing his hair, having to sell his practice, and said "I'm worthless, why do you want me, I'm useless?" I grew to love him more and more if that was possible during the months leading up to his death. I wanted desperately for him to get well and hated to see him suffer. I often thought if the roles were reversed I knew he would love me the same way. I knew deep inside that our time was limited. I cherished the moments and will forever.
Truth be known this is one of my all time FAVORITE photos of Ty and I that was taken just a few months ago. I love that to me "love" was captured. I wanted to support him and let him know that he was never alone. He had me by his side. *NOTE: take more photos. PRINT them out. MAKE memories. IT MATTERS!!!!
Last night, our kind neighbor and friend Brother Mills came and visited our family. This wonderful man shared time and visited with Tyler in the hospital two days before he passed away. Ty and our family love him and his family. He eased Ty's worries as he was preparing to leave this world. He felt prompted to come to the hospital and visit with him. He gave the boys and I each a beautiful priesthood blessing of comfort last night. I know that Ty is going to watch over me and our children. He is very close to us. Ty is very mindful of two teenage boys who will need a dad. He is mindful of me and my fears. I know that God has a plan and death is only a change. I believe that they are actually still very close to us and watch over us. I believe even more than they can physically do when they are alive. I read all my blog comments, instagram, Facebook and more. The encouragement is truly something I cling to. I love my grief bear... I look at it and remember... "be gentle, gentle" with yourself and others.