Saturday, December 27, 2014

You can do this!!!!!!

I think that for me, I am growing in ways I never thought imaginable. I find times where I just want to be alone to THINK. I overthink so much. I want to remember. I am afraid I will forget Ty. I will forget something important. I found myself in our closet last night for about three hours. I shed many tears as I looked and went through some of this stuff. I wanted to be close to him. I wanted to remember it all. I found that I would laugh, cry, smile, be sad and just go through the process again. 

I have strongly felt Heavenly Father has lessons for me to learn in Ty's absence. I think because his is gone, I am meant to grow and have this opportunity to test my faith. I strongly believe in God's Plan of Salvation for his children. I really do know with my heart that death is not the end. Still it's sad to not have our loved ones with us. My house is different now. For weeks, I expected him to walk into the room, but now I no longer expect this. It has felt like long long long weeks since Tyler died. It seems like so much longer. 

I don't and won't let myself feel sorry for myself. I know so many widows have faced this and raised their children without their husband. I could choose to use this as a excuse for a sad and dysfunctional life, but I won't allow this to happen. I have too much gratitude and thankfulness to not only survive but thrive. We all have trials and I know bad things do happen to us in life. It's how we handle what happens to us. 

Yesterday, I was spending the day designing at home, going to a meeting, calling countless companies and dealing with "issues" on my own. I need to get "new" health insurance, "car" insurance, deal with countless accounts to close them and liquidate things. So many forms and papers to do. I felt OVERWHELMED. It's just things that weigh on me and I have had to PUSH away what Ty often told me, "you can't do this without me, you need me." 

Oh how I need him, but I also have found that in the last SIX weeks I have grown so much. It is taking me time, because we were not prepared. Our denial has caused some setbacks and I am facing the issues now. I am facing the tasks ONE at a time. I am trying to just be gentle and patient. I can do this. The best thing was yesterday, and Gentry said to me... "Mom, I am so proud of you. YOU are doing this. I know this is hard, but you are taking care of things and YOU have proved to yourself that you can do ANYTHING. YOU always did and NOW you know it yourself." I was smiling and knew she was right, I can do this. It may take some time, but I will get it done... 

McKay is talking in Sacrament tomorrow in our church ward at 9am for anyone who wants to hear her talk about her mission. It is the ward right by our home. I am so thankful for her and her sweetness. Last night she had a cookie making party here with her friends. I love to hear the laughter and talking. It reminds me of the goodness of life and of good times. 

I am busy preparing for CHA in January in Anaheim too. It's going to be AMAZING. I am thankful to be speaking and to debut new products. I feel OUTRAGEOUSLY blessed. I hope to see many of you there. 


post signature

Labels: , , ,


At December 27, 2014 at 11:15 AM , Anonymous Nancy Nally said...

Honey, you run a freaking company. You can manage all of this paperwork stuff! It's just unfamiliar and different from your usual stuff, so it's not as comfortable. But if you've got the wherewithal to do what you do every day, you can manage this stuff. Just knock if off one piece at a time and make sure you consult a professional (accountant, lawyer, etc) when in doubt. #endpeptalk

At December 27, 2014 at 11:18 AM , Blogger therapygirl1961 said...

You ARE strong and amazing! Draw strength from the Lord for you will also feel strength from Ty for GOD is holding him in the palms of his hands!

At December 27, 2014 at 12:44 PM , Blogger Debbie said...

You and your family has been in my thoughts and prayers, on this holiday season. One thing a friend told to me 5yrs ago , when my husband passed . Your regular NORMAL , will never be that NORMAL again. I think I was just fighting to keeping the same. But its not.
Debbie Bradley

At December 27, 2014 at 12:45 PM , Blogger Unknown said...

You are an amazing woman! Even in your hardest time you inspire me greatly! Love and prayers to you and yours.

At December 28, 2014 at 12:06 AM , Anonymous Traci said...

Nancy, you are so right. Listen to this lady Teresa! You got this!!

At December 28, 2014 at 5:10 AM , Blogger Kathy Jo said...

You are Fabulous! And yes - you CAN do it (and are doing it!) You go girl!!! With prayers of peace and courage coming your way. You have helped me to look at my relationships in a new way - and I now cherish every moment. Thank you for sharing.

At December 28, 2014 at 8:46 AM , Blogger Unknown said...

You CAN do this!

At December 28, 2014 at 9:03 AM , Blogger Ruth G said...

Big hugs! You can do this! Good for you for keeping your eyes on the Lord and trusting in his strength and love!
Take care!

At December 28, 2014 at 9:15 AM , Blogger Jean Bullock said...

You go, Girl! We all know you can do it. May you be comforted by all the good memories and love from your family. I do not need to ask the Lord to give you strength. You already have that.

At December 28, 2014 at 9:59 AM , Blogger A quĂ© huele el Scrap said...

Good job Teresa!
You are a very strong woman and you have to be proud of you.
I always read you blog and it's the first time I write something. You are being and example for all of us.
Kisses and hugs from the Principality of Andorra (a very small country in the middle of the Pyrennees).

At December 28, 2014 at 1:22 PM , Blogger Unknown said...

Yay you!!

At December 28, 2014 at 9:47 PM , Blogger Leslie G said...

You are doing a great job Teresa! Take it a day at a time, sometimes just a moment at a time. :) Hugs to you!

At December 29, 2014 at 12:36 AM , Blogger IslandV said...

Hang in there lady! One day at a time, one DEEP breath at a time! There is NO rush! Do this at your OWN pace! You got this! And you have a TON of ppl behind you ready to catch you if you stumble or fall! ((hugs))

At January 13, 2016 at 12:08 AM , Blogger Unknown said...

soccer jerseys,cheap soccer jerseys,cheap soccer jerseys for sale,soccer jersey,usa soccer jersey,football jerseys
lebron 12
tiffany and co
ralph lauren polo
oakley outlet online
coach outlet online
basketball shoes
snow boots outlet
air jordan 13 free shipping
tory burch outlet
ugg boots
chanel handbags
uggs outlet
michael kors usa
canada goose sale
replica watches
michael kors uk outlet
canada goose outlet
futbol baratas
michael kors uk outlet

At May 26, 2016 at 12:49 AM , Blogger Unknown said...

louis vuitton outlet stores
designer handbags
ray ban
michael kors outlet clearance
michael kors outlet
coach factory outlet online
coach outlet
jordan retro 11
coach outlet
coach outlet store online
louis vuitton outlet online
michael kors outlet
louis vuitton purses
burberry outlet online
michael kors outlet
ray ban sunglasses uk
polo ralph lauren outlet
longchamp le pliage
true religion outlet online
louis vuitton purses
michael kors outlet
michael kors handbags
michael kors outlet
true religion jeans
christian louboutin sale clearance
coach outlet store
coach factory outlet
replica watches
fitflop clearance
asics running shoes
ray ban sunglasses uk
oakley sunglasses
oakley outlet
air jordan shoes
nike blazers uk
michael kors bags
coach outlet store online clearances
adidas wings
louis vuitton outlet

At June 24, 2016 at 9:58 AM , Blogger John said...

birkenstock shoes
coach outlet
coach outlet online
nike blazer
bottega veneta handbags
hollister kids
oakley sunglasses,oakley sunglass,cheap oakley sunglasses,oakley sunglasses cheap,oakley sunglasses outlet,oakley store,oakley outlet,oakley outlet store,oakley sunglasses sale,oakley sunglasses discount
coach factory outlet online
true religion
ghd flat iron
dolce and gabbana outlet online
under armour outlet
ed hardy outlet
birkenstock uk
adidas stan smith
vans outlet
ray-ban sunglasses
ralph lauren outlet
air max 90 black
tory burch outlet online
air jordans
cartier watches
true religion sale
ray ban outlet store online
ray ban sunglass,ray ban sunglasses,ray ban outlet,cheap ray bans,cheap ray ban sunglasses,cheap ray bans,ray bans
omega watches
coach outlet
nike huarache
levis 501
cheap ray bans
adidas nmd
nike air max uk
babyliss flat iron

At July 30, 2016 at 5:59 AM , Blogger said...

louis vuitton bags
michael kors outlet clearance
toms shoes
longchamp handbags
juicy couture
louis vuitton outlet
longchamp bags
ray ban sunglasses outlet
polo ralph shirts
louis vuitton handbags
coach outlet online
michael kors outlet
asics shoes
cheap ray ban sunglasses
tory burch outlet
giuseppe zanotti sandals
supra sneakers
cheap nfl jerseys
kobe 9
kate spade handbags
adidas trainers
cheap oakley sunglasses
michael kors handbags
michael kors uk
coach outlet
rolex watches
coach outlet store online
designer handbags
michael kors outlet
michael kors handbags
toms shoes
christian louboutin sale
cheap jordan shoes
asics outlet
oakley sunglasses wholesale
louis vuitton handbags
longchamp bags
pandora jewelry
michael kors outlet

At January 20, 2017 at 6:05 PM , Blogger Unknown said...

los angeles clippers jerseys
ray ban sunglasses
michael kors handbags sale
broncos jerseys
new york giants jerseys
michael kors outlet
titans jersey
dolce and gabbana shoes
cheap nfl jerseys
cleveland cavaliers

At June 14, 2017 at 1:33 AM , Blogger 1111141414 said...

jordan shoes
chrome hearts online
michael kors handbags
led shoes for kids
lacoste outlet
yeezy shoes
michael kors outlet online
hermes belt
timberland boots
tory burch outlet

At July 23, 2017 at 4:14 AM , Blogger Unknown said...

yeezy boost 350
dior glasses
roshe run
links of london
adidas tubular
light up shoes
pandora charms
adidas ultra boost uncaged
yeezy boost

At August 16, 2017 at 8:44 PM , Blogger raybanoutlet001 said...

polo ralph lauren
true religion outlet
jordan shoes
ugg outlet
detroit lions jerseys
oakley sunglasses
reebok shoes
coach outlet
yeezy shoes
polo ralph lauren

At October 30, 2017 at 2:19 AM , Blogger jeje said...

adidas neo
kobe basketball shoes
michael kors outlet
jordan retro 13
adidas tubular UK
pandora charms
kate spade outlet
converse outlet
retro jordans
adidas nmd

At November 18, 2017 at 7:19 PM , Blogger raybanoutlet001 said...

ravens jerseys
christian louboutin uk
oakley sunglasses wholesale
carolina jerseys
boston celtics
eagles jerseys
coach outlet online
kate spade sale
polo ralph lauren outlet
air jordan 4


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home