I am so THANKFUL for Sundays.
I love being able to go to church and really reflecting on my life and my beliefs. I feel so inspired and motivated to be a better person. I see my life journey and I think how I NEVER would have imagined WHERE I am and WHAT I would have faced and I am full of gratitude for the experiences that have made me who I am.
I often think how we are NOT in charge of what happens to us in life, the timing of our problems and WHEN things occur. We are merely here to learn from the experiences that we have been given. I believe our trials and joys teach us valuable life lessons. We are all so different and we each have our own journey to experience.
I am so THANKFUL, EXCITED and THRILLED to share my latest BIG DEBUT that are hitting JoAnn stores RIGHT NOW.
They are LIMITED EDITION-
BE A WARRIOR GOLD TOTE BAGS
This is WHAT has got me where I am today. I decided to FIGHT harder than I ever had to. I accepted God's plan and to BE A WARRIOR when LIFE literally knocked me to my knees.
I have NEVER known such profound sadness than when I had to watch Tyler get cancer, suffer and die. These past two years literally at times made me want to give up. I had to dig deep and remember that God is mindful of each of us. God helped me see that HIS plan is not always our plan. We don't know WHY and we merely have to FACE the trials and keep going. I choose to do this and I have really worked hard to be happy and keep going.
Ty and I both knew he was not going to make it. I am truly thankful for the TIME we were given to say goodbye and for our personal journey through this time of pure hell for us. Sorry, that is the only word I can describe how it felt. He is the one who was worried about me most and encouraged and wanted me to "go on" when I thought I could not.
So I tried and I went down on my knees and prayed for Heavenly Father many times a day to PLEASE help me. Please give me the desire to go on. I was in such a dark place and GOD is the reason I am HERE and so fortunate to be HAPPY and seeing the BEAUTY in life.
You are NEVER ever ready to go through what we have been through the past couple of years. I will NEVER ever be the same person. I say this knowing that my HEART was changed forever.
I know LIFE is so precious and we have limited TIME here with those we LOVE. Don't ever spent a moment regretting, feeling hate, judging, but simply LOVE LOVE LOVE.
I am going on.
I have amazing BIG things happening in my design business.
My heart is FULL of gratitude. I have found the desire within myself again to DESIGN and LOVE my life again. I am truly feeling thankful that I am full of inspiration again.
This is my new PSA Essentials TC products. I am so thankful for this big debut into the Stationery world. Yes, they are WHITE and GOLD...
I am loving my "LIFE" of being with my two handsome boys. My heart breaks for what they have lost in their life and my other children. I can never ever replace their dad and what an amazing father he was to the them. Ty was so close to them and called them "his buddies." Zach and I went on a date night this past week and I am so proud of this boy. I see the growth within them and how losing Tyler has made their faith stronger. He told me that every day he wakes up and "I pray everyday for the opportunity to help someone."
THIS is truly what life is about.
I filmed a new video for Canon and JoAnn this past week too. THIS is something AMAZING and good and will be debuting exclusive to JoAnn stores too. I see this as a way to KEEP documenting and capturing MEMORIES. It's so important!!!!!
I believe that we must FOCUS on the good in life and we truly just don't know where our life journey will take us. I have found this to be so true.
Last night, we went to the REAL soccer game and it was really fun. Tyler took his "girl" Tallya.
Oh to be sweet 16 again!!!!
I have been blessed to have met an amazing person. This decision to date after the death of Tyler is deeply personal. It’s a choice many of us will face. I never thought I would EVER face this to be honest.
The grief and sadness of losing a spouse can never be explained unless you have been through it. There are so many emotions and things no one will understand but YOU and you alone. There is a huge void in your life. When your partner dies, you know what deep grief it and what its truly like to be alone.
I have learned that each of us has own unique grief process and that it's all complicated. It's deeply personal and this is my new journey. Starting to date again was scary. It was not in "my life plan" at all. When things happen in my life I am a firm believer that God is mindful of me and each of us and our needs. HE brings people into your life. I see the new possibilities as I have begun this next chapter in my life journey.
This person has brought me so much joy to my life right now. I never ever thought my LIFE would be where it is RIGHT now.
Yes, it's NEVER easy. Tears come easily and change is so very hard. It has not been easy to do this because there's absolutely nothing scarier than starting over. I realized that happiness can be found again. It has for me. I have had to push all the worry and doubt from my mind and just FEEL it- TRUST it. My journey is just that... mine and mine alone. I have learned to never judge or question anyone else's journey and life. I am confident in my heart and my desire to always be a great mother, woman, and friend.
YOU truly never know that anyone has ever experienced or what they are going through. So today.... I am going to remember this-
LIFE IS SHORT, TIME IS FAST, NO REPLAY, NO REWIND, SO ENJOY EVERY MOMENT AS IT COMES.
THINK OF ALL THE BEAUTY STILL LEFT
AROUND YOU AND BE HAPPY. anne frank