Friday, May 29, 2015


It's a BOY!!!!!!

This is my NEW little GRANDSON.
This is COOPER. 
We are calling him Coop or Cooper.
He came into the world just 12 days ago.
He is stunningly gorgeous.
Gentry and Devan are doing well.
He spent some time in the NICU because he had a lung infection.
He is doing amazing now and was home a few days after he was born.

He came to visit me at my house on Wednesday when he was ten days old. I can't tell you how in LOVE we are with him. OUR family... we feel the blessing of his beautiful life in our family. Taylor is preparing now for her due date with twins and loves holding little Coop. THIS is what it is all about! 

McKay is out of school (BYU) for the Summer, but basically lives at our house. Yes, she pays rent to stay HOME... yes, she misses us. She is preparing for her service visit to Peru soon. I am so proud of her. I love this photo of us. We were fighting over who was going to hold Cooper.

I am biased but is he not the most beautiful little boy. His mommy is my Gentry. I love her with all my heart. She became a mom and WOW could I not have been more proud of the way she is loving and cherishing her son. Devan and Gentry are so united in love and with that will raise this beautiful baby boy. 

I am the happiest GRANDMOTHER. I am convinced that last Sunday when I visited them that he was "STOP taking my photo!!!!" I can't help it. He is so precious and so good. He rarely even cries but does like to stay up at night.

What a HUGE blessing to have our family have so many wonderful things happening to us. Cooper is ONE of the most FABULOUS miracles in my heart and life.

This is me. HOLDING my sweet grand baby for the very first time in the NICU. I was so happy that I don't think I could stop smiling. THIS is what I live for. FAMILY.....  

His little rough start only made our family unite more in prayer and we all felt such peace. We loved him instantly. Devan is the best dad and I adore my son in law. 

This is from Wednesday. They are standing on the porch at the house I just moved into. (yes, we officially moved on Saturday). This is their family. Cooper is only TEN days old. I was so happy to have them visit with me that day. Our entire family got together and we laughed so much. We all love the new home and it really feels "right." 

Soon there will be even more changes. A little boy and girl will be coming in August to Taylor and Travis. I am overly elated at this. This girl is 25 weeks along now. I am preparing for her big baby shower on July 11th at my home. Did I mention I have boxes EVERYWHERE? Yes, for her I would do ANYTHING. I am honored to do it. I know she is so nervous having two babies at once. She was calculating the diapers alone... yikes! So thank you girls who surprised her with BOXES of baby stuff. YOU know who you are and you are KIND beyond words. Taylor was so taken back and just called me bawling. Yes, I thought she was hurt and I calmed her down to tell me it was a GOOD cry. I love that others good will truly bless her family. THANK YOU!

We just LOVE being together. We love each other and that is really ALL that counts. 

I took this photo for Taylor this week too. How cute is her pregnant belly? I just can't believe it. PS- this was natural. No medication and it was the first month that they decided to try to get pregnant. 

Now this is my boys. They own my heart too. We moved this past week, but it has been a process for months. My boys have stepped up and sometimes they didn't. HA... true... high school boys. Thankfully, McKay and Britney helped me pack and move too. My entire neighborhood came last Saturday. I imagine I had over 50 amazing people show up to help me. I was OVERWHELMED and kept crying. Cute Taylor just kept telling me... "mom, it's okay. They want to help you. It's alright." She was so true. It was two MASSIVE U-Haul loads, 2 trucks, my car and more and we got MOST of it.

I am in my "new" home and it is a huge blessing. I am convinced this happened from inspiration. I felt strongly to move and everything simply happened effortlessly. I see my kids thriving in the new home and they are so happy.

I have BIG BIG news to share.
I am now engaged to be married.
I am outrageously lucky to have found love again.
In my wildest dreams... I would never have planned this new journey in my life.

This is Brian and he is amazing. He treats me like a princess and we fell in love instantly. It started one day when we met at a local restaurant at 5:30 pm and ordered sushi. We sat and talked until 10:00 pm without touching the food. It was instant and I felt like I had known him my entire life. We became instant best friends. I never thought this would happen again for me. NEVER... but I am so thankful it has. He is the one that makes me smile again. I truly had lost myself. I had to find myself and I did. I did not ever think I would every remarry because I would never settle. It would have to be the "perfect" person for me and for my family. Then I met him. At first it was hard. My girls did not even want to meet him. I understood and gave them that space. I knew that God had brought Brian into my life and heart. I knew this was just not a ordinary type of love. I knew he would be the one that I would spend the rest of my life with from the very start. 

He gets me. Yes, he understands me and my heart to the core. I felt the same for him. He is so kind, giving and loves people and life. We both love diet coke...ha and just are both easy going in nature. He also is strong in his values and faith and this was of upmost importance to me. 

He supports my crazy life and schedule. He went to the NYC Stationery show this month to "see my world." He supported me and would go into Joann Fabric and Crafts stores and send me photos standing by my products. He has four amazing- fabulous children. We both put family first and love our children. 

We are now officially engaged- we are so thankful for this in our life. Our children will be there when we get married June 8th. It is such a joyous and happy occasion. I am so grateful for the tender influence he is on my teenage boys. He is so kind and accepting as our family talks about Tyler. He looks as we share photos or share stories. He is that GIANT of a man. 

We were in NYC and walked to Central Park and he gave me this beautiful ring. I can't tell you how happy I am. I never thought I could ever feel this way. I am so thankful that my children and his children will be there and that they are supporting us. We have loved joining our families and the process has been beautiful and I know God has truly brought this to each of us. I am forever grateful. On Mothers Day my children and I had the most beautiful private talk. We are FAMILY and FAMILIES love and always support each other. This new journey is just that a way for me to keep going, keep living and of course finding love again in my forties. I am FOREVER thankful that God somehow knew exactly what I needed. I hope to be the same for his children.  

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Monday, May 4, 2015


Big news!!! The GOLD selphy with Teresa Collins and Canon is now available exclusively only at Jo-Ann Fabric and Craft Stores stores and online. I'm so honored, thrilled and excited for this beautiful printer to finally be debuted and on sale. Limited Edition and exclusive. So excited!!!!!!

So excited and you can get this very LIMITED EDITION now.

I have been waiting for this to FINALLY be debuted. 

It is truly just beautiful and you can print directly from your 

your phone or from your media card!!!!!!

I wanted to share photos from my sons this weekend.

Zach and Ty went to the Spartonian Ball with their girlfriends. 

Tallya is a MHS cheerleader and this was Ty's first "formal" dance.

Oh to be 16 years old again. They had a great time!!!!

Zach is 17 and this was fun to see him iron his clothes and pick out a new vest. He had never ironed so I helped show him how. I offered to do it, but he wanted to learn how to do it himself. He ended up ironing Ty's clothes for him to be nice.

The girls picked up the boys. Zach looking at his phone waiting for his date.

I am so lucky to have two sons who fight but in the end really love each other. 

I loved that I captured this photo. 

The entire last few days have been big changes. I got the keys to the house we are moving too. I thankfully have until June to MOVE out of my current home. I am making daily trips to the "new" home in my car. Friday was a big day for us.

We are only moving 15 minutes away. The best part is the boys LOVE the new house and I'm so much closer to my girls. My office is 8 minutes away too. I knew instantly that this was the place for us. It was beyond hard to be in the house that Ty and I had been together for almost 19 years. I knew we all needed and would benefit from a fresh start. I felt so strongly that it was needed. I actually knew it before Ty passed away. I will miss our current home though and be so very thankful for the good memories. 

Saturday we moved and decluttered all day and took loads to the local DI (charity) to purge. I don't know if I could have ever done this without Brian's help. I had NO IDEA what so many things were for or if they worth keeping. I am beyond thankful for this blessing. I could not have found someone more kind and sweet. 

I was never prepared for Tyler to die. Even though I knew it was terminal and he told his sister as soon as they diagnosed him, that "he was a dead man." You hold out hope and faith for a miracle. I felt so alone even though I knew many other people go through the loss of a spouse. I now have so many friends who have been widowed. There is an instant connection. We know that truly NO ONE can understand how hard it is, unless you've been through it.
You were part of a couple for so long, and now he’s gone. It was like a dream that you have a hard time really believe could happen. How do you start over when for years have depended on him for so much? I was utterly clueless and I learned that I was now alone and had to keep going. After Tyler  died, I felt that nothing mattered and nothing makes life worthwhile. I was in a dark place which is so NOT like me. Death has a funny way of making life inconsequential.
But I realized something BIG. I had lots of people helping me and I needed to help myself. I had and needed to figure what will make the rest of MY life the best LIFE I could. The day before Tyler died, he told me. I know you will remarry and I need you to KEEP LIVING and KEEP GOING. I am dying and you are not. I tried to stop him. I didn't want to have this conversation. He told me, " I am going to be happy and serving and focusing on Heavenly things and YOU will have a hard time. YOU have to promise me you won't give up." Ty knew me so well. 
I had to take it one moment at a time. And, by holding on to the hope that it was going to be okay. I realized it was never to late to start over. Here’s a quip from Jane Fonda:
“It’s never too late – never too late to start over, never too late to be happy.”
I have thought LONG and hard about LIFE and what is means to be happy. I felt guilty for being "okay" "for watching tv" "going out to eat" "laughing again" "dating" "finding love." Yes, I could do a HUGE massive list. It's called survivors guilt. I had some of Ty's closest friends share things with me after he died. He wanted me to be happy. He left messages for me that are very TENDER and true "little miracles." This private and personal journey of course is hard with my life and business. I share some but of course keep so much close to my heart. I don't expect anyone to understand the pain and heartache that me and my dear children have been through. I think of Ty's mother and sibling EVERY single day. This is HARD stuff. I watch my sons and think EVERY day... I wish Ty was here to see this. I know he is definitely HERE watching over them. I KNOW it. I know this is so deeply personal but I have complete faith in Gods' plan for us. I know that death is not the end and it's the plan of Salvation. 

Okay... now I wanted to share the move update.... 

As a designer, I wanted a home that had good bones and I could make HOME. I have lots of things that I want to do, but I am in no hurry. I instantly fell in love with this ROOM. This fireplace is taller than me and all white. I loved the LIGHT. This house has a lot of windows and I was drawn to the LIGHT that was within the home. 

There is LOTS of dark and light wood. I am going to be mixing it all. I love to mix it all up. This is table that I wanted to go with the darker floors. If you love to decorate your home- check out HOME GOODS. I tell you that you will find the best deals at GREAT prices. This is my go to place to shop at for my home. 

Most important is that this NEW beginning and HOME will be a home where my kids will feel loved, secure and at HOME. They loved moving their stuff this past weekend. Zach had his baseball friends over and they played ball. I smiled and KNEW...

It truly is going to be OKAY. Each day we have is a GIFT... I will never take one day for granted.

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