Saturday, November 12, 2016

DEATH is not the END....


This was 2 years ago today. This was right before Ty passed away and my boys were so strong. I was at the hospital every day at this point and I was deeply worried how the boys were doing. How do you prepare your children for the death of a parent? They have been so brave and kept me going. 

I was talking to my best friend today. I was dreading Christmas again this year. I was feeling a little panic. For three years we did not have a Christmas tree because of Tyler being sick. I had lost my desire to celebrate. I think with his cancer battle and his death before Thanksgiving, I had just "went through" the holidays. Celebrating was so very hard.  I can honestly say that it is because of my children that I got out of bed in the morning. It is because of them that I picked myself up and HAD to go on. I was totally unprepared on how to be alone after 19 years. Nothing can prepare you for the loss of your husband and your children's father. 

I can honestly say that the bad times and the sad times were so HARD. I cried nonstop. I begged for a miracle. It was hard to get through each day trying to smile and find joy watching someone I loved so much in pain. I never was angry or bitter. I just felt SAD. I knew I could not go "around" the trial and suffering. I had to FACE it head on and go right "THROUGH" it. There was no detour or way around it.

I know that Heavenly Father was there every moment of the way in this journey for our family and me personally. It was personal and profound. I felt moments of sheer "warmth." It was like a blanket was wrapped around me. I was being watched over and loved in my journey. I know without a doubt that God is real. Tyler was my biggest fan and he LOVED his family MORE than anything. He was the biggest hunter, fisherman, outdoorsman. He loved guns and was a huge Ted Nugent fan. He made me laugh because he was so STUBBORN in his views. I want you to know I am a better ME because of him. I am feisty and I learned to be ME and a better ME by being married to him. We challenged each other. I learned so much in my business from him. He never worked with me, but he was so good with money. He was very smart and was such a hard worker. Tyler taught me to never have debt. He would say "live under your means." He was wise and I was blessed to learn from him. I taught him how to be more "sensitive" with emotional issues. Go figure- me emotional?

I know in so many small and "profound" ways he lets me know he's still here. Tyler is still watching over us and is proud of us for the things that we continue to do to live life without him here.  I look at our two boys and I'm literally crying as I think about the blessing that I was given to raise these amazing boys.  We wanted more children together but was advised with my stroke, while pregnant with Tyler to be done having children. I knew it was the RIGHT decision. He sure loved his children. He called the girls "my girls." I loved this so very much.  I am so thankful that Tyler and I were blessed to have Ty and Zach and our crazy blended family. 

We had the hardest time deciding when deciding to name our youngest son. We were at the hospital and it was time to go home. They wanted us to name the baby boy before we left. Tyler literally had went out to get the truck to go home. They had asked me to put a name on the birth certificate and I was fighting the feelings. I don't know why but I felt so impressed to name our youngest son Tyler. I now know that baby Ty was named after his father so that he could carry on his name. 

Tyler came back into the hospital room and I had written in Tyler Lee Collins. He was reluctant at first about naming him after him. He had such a special bond with baby Ty. I often have thought it was meant to be. Tyler and Ty were buddies. Baby Ty (yes, he's 17 years old) was quite the challenge with a strong personality and Ty could handle him in ways I have never been able to.  I'm so grateful I listened to that prompting to name him after his father. It makes me very grateful that he is baby Ty forever. I'm so grateful that I have these boys and my girls. 

Zach is serving a mission and doing so well there. His weekly messages are beyond profound. He just wants to love and serve others. He's lost a lot of weight too. Tyler is doing applications for college.  I think he wants to go to University of Utah. I know crazy right? All of our children have went to BYU but he is following his own journey. This makes me happy. 

I believe that we can go through and do all things especially hard things through our faith in Jesus Christ. I will never doubt the tender feelings and witness that I received when Tyler was close to death. Death is not the end. 

Okay, I want to share something really cool. Pinner's Conference was amazing so I have decided to do a OFFICE SALE. 

Yes, my office. I am not doing it at my warehouse. I am opening it this FRIDAY:  NOVEMBER 18th from 10am-4pm. Come and SHOP and talk to me and my team.




I am selling my beautiful gold wrapping paper for $1.00 a roll. Yes, and I am setting up tables to sell some of my products RIGHT at my office. I want to give back so EVERYONE that comes gets a gift from me. I am donating all sales that day to honor Tyler to charity. I am donating it to the HUNTSMAN CANCER INSTITUTE in Tyler's memory. I have albums, gift wrap, my books, papers, punches, so much more. The prices are incredible too. I am giving you free reign in my office to shop and to do something for me and my family in Tyler's memory. I am so thankful to be able to do this.  

My office is right off 1-15 (IKEA EXIT- Bangerter HWY). I will even have treats and diet coke. It would be well worth your drive.  I would love for you to come and meet me and my team.

Friday  November 18th 2016
10am- 4:00 pm 
Teresa Collins office (not my warehouse!)
78 W 13775 South Suite 8
Draper UT 84020

Many of you will ask if we ship product. YES! 

My website only shows some of the products I have and it needs to be updated. If you are want to purchase anything elsha@teresacollinsstudio.com can get you anything you want or need. 


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2 comments:

Angelbev said...

I don;t think you're ever ready to loose a parent. When you are young and loose them, you have to re-greive when moments hit that you wish they could have been there for. As a grandma myself, I lost my mom a year ago. She had a long full life but I miss her and it hits at all sorts of odd moments.

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