Oh my... thank you for the comments and HUGE support. I had thousands of you READ my blog post and I was overwhelmed with hearing from you. It showed me more than ever how much WE NEED EACH OTHER. We are not an island. WE together are stronger.
Yesterday, I was a TRIGGER day for me.
I was driving to my most amazing dentist. Dr. Parkin is not only the BEST dentist but he was Ty's close friend. Then Ty and I got married and then we became close as to them and their family. We traveled together and just became life long close friends.
Rich was by Ty's side to the very end giving Tyler advice and support. He did the same for me and our children. I love him and his wife so much. So I went down the wrong street and realized I was driving by Ty's office. He practiced there for all the 19 years we were married. I saw the medical building and looked at the corner that had been his office suite. I immediately got tears. I felt the extreme pain of knowing he was gone. He was taken WAY too young. He loved his patients, he loved being a surgeon and he loved helping people. I thought on my youngest son who is struggling the worst from not having his dad here. I felt a moment of anger that "life is not fair." Then I drove the one block to Dr. Parkin's office. I sat in the car and just reflected. I prayed for comfort and to accept that we can't control life or death. I can only be thankful for WHAT is and WAS.
I got my teeth cleaned and was reminded again, I brush too hard. Then Rich came in to examine my teeth. We naturally talked about family. I started to cry. I told him that I just still at times can't believe Tyler died. I told him that so many people may not understand my new journey.
We talked about Tyler and what a STRONG man he was. He was so headstrong and determined. If he had his mind to do something- you could not stop him. He was always successful in life because he would not STOP until it happened. We talked about how much we missed him and stories.
We talked about Brian and how BLESSED I was to have found him. Those of you who have met him, know he's a keeper. He is so strong in his love for me and he understands (I don't know how) my journey and being married to a widow.
It ended up being a day of great of remembering Tyler.
Last night, I was really concerned for our youngest son. I was praying for guidance and it was in the middle of the night. I could not sleep. I felt so strongly that Tyler is with our son EVEN more than I can be. I felt Tyler so strongly right then with me letting me know he's with our son. I know this is personal and I don't want to share everything, but losing your dad starting at the young age of 13 to him dying when he was 15 years old has really been difficult for our youngest son.
I wanted to share my little sweet babes on Valentines Day! They came to see me... or maybe Milo. They love to come here and I love to play with them. I have high chairs, play pens and toys now so they can come and spend the night. I love this most. The kids will all come and often they stay the night or weekend. THIS TO ME IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED LIFE to be like.
This weekend it looks like McKay and Parker are both going to be here. Home from BYU and USU.
McKay needs to start her wedding prep. Anyone want to come over Friday night and help? Any takers....
We are making beautiful white hanging "things" from gold thin wire. Not sure what McKay is calling them.
We make out of white tissue paper.
So I had to share McKay's engagement photos. I am in love. These were taken last month in the SNOWY Utah mountains.
McKay and Mauro are getting married
April 20th (thursday)
in the Provo LDS Temple.
We have not done the invites and all friends and family
Reception will be in Provo that night and another
reception in Mexico to celebrate
April 29th 2017.
I know that LOVE is truly what we are here to learn. We need to love ourselves and love others. I know that we can be married or single but we need to SPREAD LOVE to others.
LOVE is the most powerful gift we can give not only ourself but
those that we love.